Do you have a student going to school in the United States? Worried about state and federal officials not enacting common-sense gun laws? Do you doubt that good guys with guns can’t actually stop the bad guys with guns? Do you want to see your children come home every day they go to school?

Well, Congrats to you because we have what every schoolchild needs! New Bullet Proof Lunch pails that deflect even the strongest assault weapon ammunition! It even folds out to act as a buffer for other students to hide behind when another lawful gun owner takes the replacement of white folks into their own hands.

Order fast because you never know when your school is next!